Two gods, Cardea and Portunes, are arguing about which of them is superior. They are interrupted by Priapus, who constantly has a giant, exposed erection, and are shocked into silence, which is what Zeus sent Priapus to do.


The Gods of Doors

On Olympus, two very important gods are arguing. Yet again.

Cardea: "You can't say that you're more important than me. Without me, there'd be no door at all!"

Portunes: "Ah, but I am the God of Locked Doors! If I say so, you can't open. At all. Stuck. Stranded. Until I let you go, my dearest."

Cardea: "I'm The Goddess of Door Hinges and without me you couldn't even lock a door. You couldn't open a door! Doors wouldn't exist!"

Priapus: "Zeus sent me over to tell you guys to be qu--"

Cardea & Portunes: "ARGH!!!"

The two door-based gods balk in the sight of the giant phallus-god.

Priapus: "Okay. So you'll be quiet, right? Thanks. Bye."

The penis-god stomps off.


Cardea: "I'm still better than you."


Britt's Commentary

"Cardea, Portunes and Priapus were based upon the actual gods Cardea[Ext 1], Portunes[Ext 2] and Priapus[Ext 3]. I wrote this post to support Al's creation of his new thread but doubted I would take to the thread much as the cosmic deities hold little interest for me. Later I would find I could contribute more to the thread." - Britt the Writer


External References

  1. Cardea article, Wikipedia.
  2. Portunes article, Wikipedia.
  3. Priapus article, Wikipedia.

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